I used to think I'd never get married. Even though it was something I wanted desperately, I was afraid that I'd be one of the unlucky few who got passed over. Was I too fat, not funny enough, not pretty enough? Did God want me to stay single even though I didn't feel called to celibacy? I didn't know. When I lost weight, nothing changed. When I focused intensely on the Lord, nothing changed. When I prayed like crazy, nothing changed.
But then something changed. I met Mary Morken, a woman whose story of marrying her best friend, Hubert, sparked hope in me. I had a best friend, too. His name was Steve Watters. But like Mary and Hu, we were "just friends." I shadowed her for advice. And wisdom. She helped me see that my prayers for a husband were less prayer and more faithless requests for something I wasn't even sure it was OK to want. Or want that much.
Through Hu and Mary's counsel, and by God's boundless grace, He helped me see that what I wanted was less marriage-as-He-created-it and more marriage-in-the-Hollywood-fashion. Get Married is partly the story of my path to marriage. But it's even more about God's created order—of male and female designed to form families for His glory, and our good. It's about how He changed my perspective so I could pray for the very thing most believers are called to puruse. It's about marriage.
There is much that you as a single Christian woman can do to help it happen. That's why I wrote this book and why we're here, as a community of women, encouraging each other.
Nuts and Bolts Stuff
I wrote Get Married: What Women Can Do to Help it Happen in 2008. My newest book, co-authored with Steve Watters, is Start Your Family: Inspiration for Having Babies. Back in 1998, I started Boundless webzine for Focus on the Family. Originally just for collegians, Boundless has expanded, speaking to single adults in their 20s and 30s. It's also grown to include a blog and podcast.
Though most of my time these days involves changing diapers, folding laundry and reading books to our four children (ages 9-9 mos.), I write a bi-weekly advice column for women. If you have a question you'd like to see answered on the podcast or in the column, please send me an email.
