The Fifth Day of Christmas

I used to sing The Twelve Days of Christmas like any kid, always getting mixed up about the maids-a-milking and lords-a-leaping, after the five-go-old-rings. But I never knew that the first day of Christmas is actually December 26. Till now.

I've been reading (and loving) Walter Wangerin's Preparing for Jesus this Advent and Christmas season. The book has a chapter for each day of December and on into January, up until the Twelfth Day of Christmas. Today's reading was about Simeon. If you've never had something to guide you through Advent, this is a wonderful book to consider!

Thanks to the inscription on the inside flap, I know this is my fourth attempt to read the book through. And for the first time, I'm eager, and expecting, to make it to the end. It's not the book's fault, just the busyness that can sap my good intentions!

You know how it is, with all those packages to mail to out-of-town family.

Not to mention all the baking that had to happen before we could mail the packages.

Although, actually, well, ah, those cookies were the ones my sister sent to us. And so it was that we were eating the cookies we were making to send out as gifts as well as the ones we were receiving in the mail.

Somehow we did manage to get enough baking done to fill our bellies as well as those of our loved ones. This year our favorite (and most re-made) cookies were the mint chocolate ones. I was craving peppermint all month long! How about you? What was your favorite baked treat — sweet or salty — that you made or received?

As you can imagine, we've also been busy with the pre-launch work on Marry Well. As part of the prep, I'm working on a "state of online dating" article to update Browsing for a Mate. A lot has changed since that first ran on Boundless in 2005, both in the online dating marketplace as well as in expectations and habits. (Did you know that as many as 1 in 8 new marriages begin online? I'm learning all sorts of new things working on this!)

Much of my inspiration for this re-approach to online dating comes from the stories I hear from readers. What's your experience — or non-experience — with e-dating? I'd love to hear!

Comments

[Alicia]

Hi Candice : )

I love what you wrote in your other article about browsing for a mate:

"But lifelong marriages don't just grow out of compatibility. They happen for one primary reason: commitment."

Hear, hear! : ) I have been very fortunate to have been witness to several life-long marriages in my family, my parents included. The glue that has held these marriages together for so long is just what you mentioned--commitment. A loyal devotion to a spouse through good times and in bad. Through the ups and downs of life and through the likes and dislikes of a marriage partner.

It's saying, "I'm committing myself to you, whether you're this or that." I've been learning a lot about love for the last several months and (hello, it isn't rocket science, but it has finally hit my brain!) love is all about choosing to look out for the other person's best interests. It's serving them in love and asking the question, "What can I do to bring good into this person's life? What is best for this person?"

I think that a lot of people get confused about love nowadays and think that love is about getting something for themselves. And it's true, a Godly relationship will be mutual and there will be love from both sides. However, love goes the extra step and takes personal responsibility to ask about what is best for the other person first. I believe that love is sacrificial.

Jesus talked about the greatest kind of love being the kind that lays itself down for another. Even He washed His disciples feet, even though He didn't have to. Everything Jesus did was looking out for what God wanted Him to do and to serve and love others through that love and devotion to God.

I want to be a more loving person and to think about others before I think about myself. God is showing me this in the many ways that others have reached out to share their love with me. The Lord has been blessing my heart with the love of friends and because my cup is filled, it becomes this natural, easy thing to want to reach out and love others.

I think that that is one of the secrets to loving others. Jesus said that the woman who washed His feet with her tears showed much love because she had been loved much. I think that as we draw deep from the wellspring of God's love (which is deep and overflowing for EVERYone) and as we experience that love, that it transforms us. As our cups are filled, we are able to reach out and fill other people's cups, including our spouse's cup.

Whenever I feel empty, I've been asking God to show me His love and as He does, I start to feel filled up and am able to reach outside of myself because those dry areas have already been touched by His hand of love first. : ) Hope that makes sense. It's sometimes difficult for me to put my thoughts into words. ; )